Hello, Ma

Sharing Stories

July 25, 2022 at 10:44 a.m.

A heptagon with internal seven-pointed star.

...by John W. Sweazey

Hello, Ma,

I have something better to propose to you than chicken soup. It is a way to start a new Jordan River. You can put it wherever you want it, and it will not take any water away from the old Jordan but will add water more and more. It will make the old Jordan more temperate in its behavior and this will cause the desert to bloom.

If you think it is going good now, it will seem like Mickey Mouse next to Big Ben. This is a much better way than the grabbing greedily at the water that is there. This plan will work in perfectly with the youth movements and way of life you are promoting.

This is the water of right usefulness that will heal the nations, the people, and the land.

If I can establish communication with you, I will explain as much as you wish. It is a scientific plan, not something nebulous.

Most respectfully,
J. W. Sweazey

[This was my note to Mother Earth back in 1967. I’d given up on sharing my ideas (about building inexpensive shelters like geodesic domes and designing communities that would serve citizens more efficiently) with Presidents and heads of successful businesses. (Though Buckminster Fuller and I have shared some good and encouraging epistles.) This letter, fruit of my frustration, took the better part of a day to complete. Exhausted, I left it lying on the table. Around bedtime, I discovered the following note next to it—from my wife—written on a large sheet of paper in green ink.]

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY PROPHETS ARE NOT HONORED IN THEIR OWN COUNTRIES?
ANSWER: THAT’S WHERE THEY DROP THEIR CLOTHES ON THE FLOOR!

This morning, starting from the front bedroom, I picked up 4 sox, 3 shirts, a jacket, a pair of pants, a wet towel, shorts, and much more.

Why? The reason you always give is that I need bending exercise! And your wet towel can be used to clean the floor! (You prophets also leave your pocket dumpings on the table.)

Actually, we commoners really like you prophets quite a lot, but we can’t understand your necessity to mess up the scene.

We might even take your message about helping all of humanity, beautifying the world, the new society, etc., etc. a little more seriously if you didn’t leave a half hour of crumby pick-up every morning.

So, I appreciate all those fine things you do.

But honestly, Roomie, don’t you think the droppings are a bit gross?

Love,
Your Collection Agency

PS All is forgiven—I forgot your vitamins this morning!

After her note, I jotted in red crayon “USE SAND IN BOTTOM OF SHOWER.” (As my brilliant suggestion for how to tidy up after my morning cleanse.)

Next morning, I noticed she’d quickly jotted after that, “Yeah.”

John W. Sweazey retired Emeritus from the University of Washington at fifty, spending his following years working predominantly on the architectural wonders of the pyramid and the heptagon.

SHARING STORIES is a weekly column for and about the 50 plus crowd living in the Puget Sound region. Send your stories and photos to ariele@comcast.net. Tell local or personal stories; discuss concerns around aging and other issues; share solutions, good luck, and reasons to celebrate; poems are fine too. Pieces may be edited or excerpted. We reserve the right to select among pieces. Photos are always a plus and a one-sentence bio is requested (where you live, maybe age or career, retired status, etc.).
SHARING STORIES is featured on www.northwestprimetime.com, the website
for Northwest Prime Time, a monthly publication for baby boomers, seniors, retirees, and those contemplating retirement. For more information, call 206-824-8600 or visit www.northwestprimetime.com. To find other SHARING STORIES articles on this website type "sharing stories" or a writer’s name into the search function above.