How to Help a Hoarding Parent

SAVVY SENIOR

| February 11, 2025

Dear Savvy Senior,

My dad has always been a pack rat, but since mom died a few years ago he’s become more of a hoarder. The clutter in his house has gotten out of control and I don’t know what to do. Any suggestions?

–Distraught in Centerville

Dear Distraught,

Unfortunately, hoarding or clutter addiction is a problem that’s become increasingly common in the U.S. It effects approximately 6 percent of Americans age 65 or older. The problem can range anywhere from moderate messiness to hoarding so severe it may be related to a mental health disorder like obsessive-compulsive disorder. Here’s what you should know, along with some tips and resources that can help you help your dad.

Why People Hoard

The reasons most people hoard is because they have an extreme sentimental attachment to their possessions, or they believe they might need their items at a later date. Hoarding can also be a sign that an older person is depressed, anxious or showing early symptoms of dementia.

Common problems for seniors who live in excessive clutter are tripping, falling and breaking a bone; overlooking bills and missing medications that are hidden in the clutter; suffering from the environmental effects of mold, mildew and dust, and even living among insects and rodents.

What to Do

To help you gauge your dad’s problem, the Institute for Challenging Disorganization (ICD) offers a free “Clutter Hoarding Scale” that you can download at ChallengingDisorganization.org.

If you find that your dad has a moderate cluttering problem, there are a number of things you can do to help.

Start by having a talk with him, expressing your concern for his health and safety, and offering your assistance to help him declutter.

If he takes you up on it, most professional organizers recommend decluttering in small steps. Take one room at a time or even a portion of a room at a time or a closet or drawer. This will help prevent your dad from getting overwhelmed.

Before you start, designate three piles or boxes for your dad’s stuff – one pile is for items he wants to keep-and-put-away, another is the donate pile and the last is the throwaway pile.

You and your dad will need to determine which pile his things belong in as you work. If he struggles with sentimental items that he doesn’t use, suggest he keep only one item for memory sake and donate the rest to family members who will use them.

You will also need to help him set up a system for organizing the kept items and new possessions.

Find Help

If you need some help with the decluttering and organizing, consider hiring a professional organizer who can come to your dad’s home to help you prioritize, organize and remove the clutter.

The National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals (NAPO.net) and the ICD (ChallengingDisorganization.org) both offer directories on their websites to help you locate a professional in your area.

If your dad has a bigger, more serious hoarding problem (if his daily functioning is impaired, or if he is having financial difficulties, health problems, or other issues) you’ll need to seek professional help.

Talk therapy and/or antidepressants can help address control issues, anxiety, depression, and other feelings that may underline hoarding tendencies, and make it easier for him to confront his disorder.

To locate help, contact Helping Elders Live Productively (H.E.L.P.). This is a free education, counseling, and referral resource that helps older adults and their families who are experiencing hoarding, by connecting them with legal services, mental health assistance and support groups. Call 310-533-1996 for a referral or visit Help4srs.org/support-services-for-seniors-who-hoard.

You can also find professional help through the International OCD Foundation, which provides a hoarding center on their website at Hoarding.iocdf.org.

And to get help with challenging cleanup jobs, the biggest provider is Steri-Clean, Inc. (see Hoarders.com or call 800-462-7337), a hoarding cleanup company that has franchises located throughout the country.

Send your senior questions to: Savvy Senior, P.O. Box 5443, Norman, OK 73070, or visit SavvySenior.org. Jim Miller is a contributor to the NBC Today show and author of “The Savvy Senior” book.

Share this story!
Who’s Eligible for Social Security Disability Benefits?
Getting Social Security Disability Insurance benefits (SSDI) when you’re unable to work can indeed be challenging. Each year, approximately 2 million people apply for SSDI,...
Driving with Dementia and Knowing When to Stop
Watch for the warning signs... Transition tips... Time to quit...

Related

Coping with enlarged prostate symptoms without medication or surgery
Although you should always see a doctor if you’ve got an enlarged prostate, there are methods of reducing symptoms without resorting to surgery....
The smart way to treat knee pain to avoid surgery
Knee surgery is expensive and painful. Avoid surgery with the following knee pain management techniques....
COVID 19 News Update
How well a COVID-19 vaccine protects you depends on how the virus changes... it also depends on timing...
Smart Technology for Older Adults
“Start small,” suggests dos Santos. Start with a device you already have or know a bit about...
10 Tips to assessing your fitness level
10 health and fitness tests for adults over the age of 55: This article takes an honest look at the unrealistic definition of “fit” as...
3 Fun Ways To Spend Your Time During Retirement
Retirement is a great time to focus on your favorite activities and hobbies...

BE IN THE KNOW

NWPT-Subscribe

Recent Posts

Seattle Senior Resource Fair
Pick a peck of purple pickled onions
A New Lens on Dementia Care
Sent Across the Nation
Enjoy a Door County Tradition When You Experience a Fish Boil

BE IN THE KNOW

NWPT-Subscribe

Recent Posts

Seattle Senior Resource Fair
Pick a peck of purple pickled onions
A New Lens on Dementia Care
Sent Across the Nation
Enjoy a Door County Tradition When You Experience a Fish Boil